


No Escape

by PurpleArrowzandLeather



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Arthur could have figured it out, F/M, Panicky Merlin, even if he is a dollophead, no unhelpful dragons allowed, such feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 15:42:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17490725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PurpleArrowzandLeather/pseuds/PurpleArrowzandLeather
Summary: Both Arthur and Merlin survive the ending battle and life goes on in Camelot. Arthur notes that Merlin seems particularly distracted and won't let him leave until he explains what's going on. Merlin can't bring himself to lie to him anymore.





	No Escape

**Author's Note:**

> I got onto a Merlin kick. This is officially not my fault.  
> Also, I don't own Merlin/BBC. Obviously. Because that would be crazy.

          Arthur has been anxious since returning to the castle. Him and his knights had been outside of the walls when the scared guards called them back with another sorcerer hunt. Arthur can’t help but wonder just how many sorcerers are around to merit this type of insanity. The guards have no reason to fear. 

          Still, Merlin does his best to reassure him. For all of his efforts, Arthur snaps at him and orders him to leave. He doesn’t see the boy until the next day, but he seems… distracted. There are days where Arthur wonders if he has a brain in that pointy head of his. 

          “Merlin!” 

          He flinches, looking at Arthur with an almost injured look in his eye. “Yes, Arthur?” 

          “Did you forget you were in the middle of cleaning my boots?” 

          He glances down at the boot over his right hand and the brush in his left. He denies it. He gives the boot half-hearted brush as he commits to his little lie. 

          “Right, well, as you were, Merlin. After you’ve finished, you can wash my clothes and polish my armor.” 

          Arthur moves behind the wall of his changing booth, but he doesn’t hear anymore sound from Merlin. He pokes his head around the edge, searching for the absent-minded manservant. He hasn’t moved, the boot still on his hand as he stares down at it.  

          Merlin has already zoned out again and Arthur raises a brow. “Merlin!” 

          Merlin’s head snaps up and he turns towards Arthur, picking up his simple blue shirt and leather jacket. He drapes them over the changing panels, Arthur pulling them over the edge to put them on. Merlin still doesn’t say a word. 

          “Are you all right, Merlin?” 

          “Fine.” 

          “Right.” Arthur waits for him to say something quippy, but he never does. “So, what’s troubling you, Merlin?” 

          He shakes his head. “It’s nothing.” 

          “Come on. Don’t be like that. I can see something’s wrong, so why don’t you just tell me what it is and see if I can help you?” 

          “Arthur, you don’t have to- “ 

          “Merlin, come on, just tell me.” 

          He sighs, bowing his head as he turns towards the door. “Will that be all, sire?” 

          “Merlin, stop.” 

          “I’ll get to work on that armor straightaway,” 

          “Merlin, stop! That is an order.” 

          He freezes and Arthur walks around his front. Merlin refuses to look him in the eye, an action that strikes Arthur as completely unnatural. Merlin is the only one he’s ever known with enough gall to fight him. 

          “Merlin, look at me.” 

          The servant does so, but Arthur is startled to see the tears in his eyes. “Yes, sire?” 

          “What’s going on? You aren’t normally like this.” 

          “Arthur…” 

          “You can tell me anything.” 

          Merlin shakes his head. “I think if I tell you this, I- I’d be more likely to die if I told you rather than get your help.” 

          Arthur makes him sit down and he can feel Merlin’s slight frame shaking under his hand. “I doubt it’ll kill you to be honest with me.” 

         “Arthur, trust me. There is nothing I would like to do more than tell you the truth, but you don’t understand!”  

          Arthur can’t help but wonder why anything could be so important that Merlin would be so reluctant to tell him. He sits down on the edge of the windowsill, crossing his arms and giving Merlin a long look. Merlin wipes the side of his face and Arthur considers the things that could be bothering him.  

          There isn’t much that comes to mind. The only thing Arthur understands about this is that Merlin is now, for whatever reason, terrified. Not just of whatever he’s hiding, but of Arthur himself. 

          “Explain this to me, Merlin. What could you tell me that would get you killed?”  

          Merlin looks at him, tears dripping down his face. He shakes his head, placing it in his hands.  

          It’s then that Arthur realizes. All those finicky moments when Merlin seemed just a tad off, or when things mysteriously disappear and Merlin shows up. There are also those times when he is the last man standing after everyone has been unconscious. 

          “Merlin. I’m going to ask you this once, and you had better be honest with me.” 

          He nods, a sob dropping from his mouth. “I swear it, sire.” 

          Arthur can’t believe how blind he’s been, but he can see clearly why Merlin is so afraid. “Do you have magic, Merlin?” 

          He breaks down and Arthur watches for a long while. Merlin has been by his side for years and he has never said anything. It takes him a long time, but he nods, admitting it. Arthur doesn’t know what to think. His father used to say that it was impossible to trust someone who had lied to him, but Merlin? Merlin has never hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it. Merlin has sacrificed himself for Arthur many times over.  

          Seeing him the way he is now makes it impossible to hate him. The skittish nature and strange behavior all makes sense now. Merlin himself makes a clearer picture than ever.  

          “What am I to do with you, Merlin?” 

          He doesn’t answer, the keening noise he makes instead agonizing to hear. Arthur lets a light smile slide onto his face.  

          “How blind you must think me.” 

          Merlin sniffs, his shoulders shaking. “I was hiding it from you.” 

          “From me, or from my father?” 

          A choked laugh follows and Arthur smiles. “Uther. Definitely Uther.” 

          “Well then. It should please you to know that my father is dead.”  

          “There is no right answer to that.” 

          Arthur huffs. “No, I suppose there isn’t. Still, my father, God rest his soul, was a tyrant. I loved him, but there is nothing I can do to change that. It does sting a bit to know you’ve lied to me for so long, but Merlin? If you had wanted to hurt me you would have most definitely done it by now. And if you were still making a plan to do so, we would both be old and grey before I ever died, so…” 

          “I’ve already been old and grey more than a few times.” 

          Arthur’s brow furrows. “What?” 

          Merlin chuckles weakly. “Do you, um, do you remember that old wizard? The one in the red robes?” 

          “Yes, of course I do, Merlin. He saved my life when Mordred tried to kill me.” 

          “No, I saved your life when Mordred tried to kill you.” 

          Arthur’s jaw drops, a huff coming from his mouth. “No way, Merlin. That man is like a million years old.” 

          “And that lady by the lake who you brought clothes to? The one who kidnapped me?” 

          “No-“ 

          “I was her. She didn’t hold me hostage or anything like that.” 

          “Prove it.” 

          Merlin wipes his face, nodding. He sniffles, standing up and brushing his clothes with shaky hands. “Okay.” 

          He transforms right in front of Arthur, something Arthur doubts he ever dreamed of doing. “Whoa.  _You_  look terrible.” 

          Merlin attempts to straighten, groaning. “Ugh. I’m just gonna… change back now. I do certainly hope you understand.” He gives himself a shake as he turns back to normal, bending each of his knees. 

          “Of course, wait… that means-….” Arthur tilts his head. “You tried to save my father?” 

          Merlin freezes before stuttering out his answer. “Arthur, I- I tried, I swear. I did everything I could, please, I- I tried. I tried, I-“ 

          “Merlin. I don’t blame you.” Merlin turns towards the door, covering his face with his hands as he searches for an escape. Since Arthur ordered him to stop earlier, Merlin knows he can’t leave. “Merlin?” 

          Arthur moves to put a hand on his shoulder, the young man still facing the door. Merlin shrinks away from his hand, a whimper drawing from his throat as he backs up against the wall. Arthur looks down at his hand and back up to Merlin, astonishment running through him as Merlin sinks to the floor, cradling his head. 

          “You’ve never been afraid of me before.”  

          Merlin takes a deep breath. “You h-had no reason to kill me before.” 

          Arthur glances at his sword on the table. Just the thought of taking it to Merlin makes him sick to his stomach. Arthur sits down next to him, trying to ignore the way Merlin leans away from him out of fear. He doesn’t like the taste in his mouth that comes with his disgust. He’s disgusted with  _himself_  for making Merlin able to even think that Arthur would hurt him. 

          “All these long years, I have never had a better friend than you, Merlin. As hard as this is to wrap my head around, never forget that. I won’t hurt you, I swear it on my life.” 

          Merlin calms some. “You don’t understand. I have used magic for you almost every day of your life. From the very beginning.” 

          “For me? How?” 

          “Do you remember that time you got shot with an arrow? And you thought you should have died?” 

          “We met that strange man."

          "I knew he had magic, and he knew I did, too. And do you remember Balinor?"

          "The one who was supposed to be able to control dragons? Yeah. I remember you being pretty broken up over it.” 

          “He…” Merlin buries his head behind his knees. “He was my father.” 

          Arthur tilts his head against the door, wondering how stupid he would have to have been to miss it. The man’s death had hit Merlin hard. Harder than it should have.

          “So… that dragon I supposedly killed?” 

          “I sent him away. All the dragons that have turned around and flew away were my doing.” 

          “Why didn’t you send him away when he first started attacking Camelot?” 

          “I couldn’t. Not until my father died.” 

          “Ah.” 

          Arthur wonders now about every victory he’s ever had. “How many other times have you saved my life?” 

          Merlin laughs, though, the sound is akin to a sob. “I lost count a month after I met you.” 

          “So, when you said you could take me apart with less than one blow….” 

          “I meant it.” 

          “Every time I think I know you, Merlin. You keep surprising me.”  

          Merlin wipes his face, struggling to calm down. Arthur figures that’s what happens when someone spends a few years in fear for their life.  

          “Do you remember Will?” 

          “Of course, he pushed me out of the way of a crossbow bolt in Ealdor. He had magic.” 

          Merlin gives him a look. 

          Arthur clicks his tongue, nodding slowly. “Will didn’t have magic.” 

          “No. I meant to tell you that day, but then Morgana came in and I… I just couldn’t. All this time I’ve been lying to you and it’s all because I was- I  _am_  a coward.” 

          “No, Merlin. You could never be a coward. Not after everything you’ve followed me into.” 

         The comment doesn’t even merit a chuckle from him. Arthur pats his shoulder, giving him a small comforting shake. Even as much as Uther tried to drill it into his skull, Arthur can’t hate Merlin for being what he is.  

          Merlin shrugs his hand away and pushes from the wall, walking across the room. “I’m sorry, Arthur.” 

          Arthur smiles a little. “I don’t understand why you’re so afraid. As powerful as you are, you could stop me if I tried anything.” 

          Merlin shakes his head. “Never. I would never do that.” 

          There is a small pause as Arthur considers him. All Merlin has ever done is try to help. “But you could. So why worry about what I could do to you when you can just… disappear?” 

          “I don’t want to leave Camelot, Arthur! I want to stay here by your side!”  

          Arthur blinks at him. “Why? For years, I have treated you like a slave and you have said  _nothing_. You never did anything, not once. You helped me save Gwen and marry her! You have been the most loyal servant in the history of servants, and I only ever yelled at you for it.” 

          “It’s my destiny to protect you!” 

          “………What?!” 

          Merlin worries at his bottom lip, wringing his hands. “The future all depends on you, Arthur. The future of Camelot, the future of Albion. All of it requires you being king!” 

          “The future? Albion? For the love of Camelot, what are you talking about?” 

          Merlin crosses his arms, running a hand over his face. “I, uh, I can see into the future.” 

          Arthur furrows his brow. “This is, quite frankly, insane.” 

          “Morgana could do it. With her dreams.” 

          Arthur shakes his head. “This is incredible. Never have I been more impressed by you or seen myself more like an idiot. You have managed to safely escape every sorcerer hunt my father ever mounted and made yourself look like a complete idiot in the process.” 

          “…” 

          Arthur chuckles. “That is a compliment, Merlin.” 

          The servant leans his head against the window, peering out with a look that Arthur interprets as trapped. Even after Arthur’s reassurances, he still seems to be antsy. Merlin always made efforts to be loyal to Arthur alone, and now Arthur supposes it's time to return the favor.

          “I’m not going to send you away, either.” 

          “Why? I betrayed you?” 

          Arthur laughs. “Since when?” 

          “Aren’t you angry with me? Don’t you want to yell or throw something or hit me? I’ve hidden the biggest secret ever for the last six years and you don’t want to retaliate?!” 

          “Of course not! Merlin, you’re my friend!” 

          Merlin scoffs. “There are so many times that I have said that to you, but you denied it every time!” 

          Arthur inhales sharply, ready to argue when he realizes that Merlin isn’t wrong. “I-… I’m sorry, Merlin.” 

          “I told you I was more than happy to be your servant. I wasn’t lying.” 

          Arthur sighs. “Look, Merlin. I may never have told you this, but… you are like-… you are like the obnoxious little brother that I never had.” 

          Merlin stills in his anxious shifting. There are tears falling down his face and a tremor in his voice as he quietly thanks him. His hands tug at his sleeves as he wipes his face again. He's still so afraid, and Arthur thinks that he's seeing what every sorcerer felt when they fled Camelot.

          “What do you say we go outside the walls for a little while and you show me what you’ve got, eh Merlin?” 

          He huffs. “Like you could ever defeat me.” 

          Arthur pulls his sword belt around his waist, beckoning Merlin to come along. They ride out five miles, stopping in a clearing. Arthur sets up a couple of targets and then pulls out his sword. 

          “Ready?” 

          Merlin chuckles, pulling a staff out of thin air. “I have been waiting to tell you this for years, Arthur. I am more than ready.” 

          Arthur pulls his crossbow from the saddle of his horse and Merlin smirks. He fires the first bolt, expecting Merlin to be unprepared. He stops the bolt in its place and sends it flying back towards Arthur without a word. Merlin stops the bolt under his chin, grinning. 

          Arthur spreads his arms and tips his head up. “Point taken, Merlin.” 

          The bolt drops and Arthur scoffs, a laugh in his voice as he goads Merlin just a little. Merlin takes him on with his staff, foregoing the magic bit. Arthur lands flat on his back. 

          “This was easier when you were a helpless idiot.” 

          Merlin snickers, helping him up. “You mean this used to be easier when I was saving your life instead of fighting you?” 

          Arthur glares, pointing at him as he gets back into fighting stance.. “You’d better watch that big head of yours, Merlin. It’s an easy target.” 

          Merlin backs up a couple steps, making fire leap up in a circle around Arthur. “You’ll have to catch me first.” 

          Arthur raises a brow. “Really? That’s like cheating, Merlin.” 

          “Oh, I’ll show you cheating.” 

          The dragon may have been a step too far, but Merlin just couldn’t help himself. His magic has been a secret for far too long. 

          “Yes, Merlin. I do believe  _that_  qualifies as cheating.” 

          Kilgarrah leaves in a huff, but Arthur is most certainly impressed. Merlin shows him a few more simple spells and puts a light enchantment on his sword. They return to the castle after Arthur’s curiosity is sated. 

          “So, Merlin, now that I can safely say I know pretty much everything there is to know about you, what do you say? Friends?” 

          Merlin huffs a bit. “I’ve always been your friend.” 

          “Yes. Yes you have, Merlin. Now….” he casts Merlin an almost conniving glance. “Do my laundry and sharpen my sword.” 

          Merlin gets a devilish look about him, picking up a basket to gather the clothes. “Yes, sire.” 

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know about you guys, but this was more the kind of reveal I expected. Also, it just still completely sucks the way the series ended.


End file.
